life update

on the house search:

realtors suck. they're sharks. they only care about money. they'll give you any shpiel to get you to go with them. i can't just go look at houses on my own.

on my health:

i've gained back 3 lbs and stayed there. i need to get back to my better habits and work out again my but shoulder is an obstacle right now.

at the big d show i must have pulled something and as a result i ripped some tendons in my shoulder. i've been suffering for 2 weeks. i went to the doctor finally yesterday and she put me on these anti inflammatory pills. they said they "mat cause drowsiness" and that i should take one a day but she told me i could take 2 the first day. so i did. they took forever to kick in but then somewhere in the middle of the night i woke up and scratched myself and i felt numb on the top layer of my skin. it was the weirdest thing. yet i still had the shoulder pain. i feel ok this morning but i usually feel good in the mornings and throughout the day the pain gets worse and worse till its night time and i can't sleep. i'm really hoping these pills work and this thing gets better. i don't wanna have to come in for cortisone shots. but i'm so over this damn pain. i can't do anything. its my right shoulder and i'm right handed.

on my feelings:

i'm feeling empty right now. its probably the PMS. also probably because i don't have anything to look forward to. i always do better with thing to look fwd to. ed has been so busy the last week. i hardly see him at all. i definitely have resentment that he's out having beers and dancing on tables (Opa) with people and going out to dinners while i sit here alone in the dark with no one to talk to. it wouldn't bother me if i had my own things going on to keep me busy, but i don't.

on that job:

i followed up and the woman said she wants to work with me but that things are on hold right now. which is fine with me. i almost feel like i should just get any job right now.to do my part.

on mission ska:

don't be mistaken. mission ska is still very much alive. things have slowed down at the moment because there's just not much going on. i still have plans to put on a show but this time i won't be rushing into it. i'm going to take my time and plan it out really well. because we're looking for houses i don't feel like i should be putting our money on the line unless i'm really sure things will work out. ed already told me this is costing him money. but for those of you who think this was just some fad, some idea i started but gave up on, you're wrong. its just a lull but things are still ongoing.

on the bright side"

i got my first paycheck from cafe press $137 :)