getting emotional and overcoming it

the other day i was feeling very emotional (that time of the month) and i had a really bad day. i had broken down crying at school for something that shouldn't have made me cry. but i was just feeling like it was all getting to be too much. i was driving to pick up ed from work, and it was almost 7pm and i was coming from school feeling just overwhelmed and then Selena's "Dreaming of You" came on the radio and i just lost it.

"Late at night when all the world is sleeping i'll stay up and think of you...." its so peaceful and beautiful it just put me at peace. Like a warm blanket coming over me to comfort me. I really needed it. And then i started to cry. Because in my head i was singing it to my unborn child. Because despite everything, all the mean people out there, all the stress, all the bad drivers, all the harshness of the world, we can just curl up...me and my baby...and nothing else will matter. I'm doing all this for you, my baby. One day it will just be you and me and daddy and the rest of the world will cease to exist. We'll be in our own little world. And it will all have been worth it. And i will shield you from all the negativity.

so they can hurt me, and yeah i'll cry because i'm not that strong. but i'm not gonna give up. i'm not gonna run away.

in school...when they made me cry, i ran to the bathroom and sobbed. i wanted nothing more than to leave. just go home. i didn't want to see any of them. i just wanted to go home and be around people who love me. but i didn't have a choice. i had to stay. i had work to do. so i wiped away the tears. splashed some water on my face and went back out there. i didn't run away. and i'm proud of myself.