my christmas goal

i really really want to be in onederland by christmas eve. christmas eve is HUGE in our family. its the one time of year that our huge extended family gets together and all the cousins i never see all come down. so this will be the big reveal. and i want it to be a BIG reveal. I want to be in onderland and i'll do everything I can to make that happen.

I'm 216.5lbs as of last friday. I'm hoping I can lose 17 lbs in 2 months. Sounds easy enough right? But I've been losing .5lbs-2lbs a week. so at this rate i might barely make it. i've been working out 5-7 days a week for 3 weeks now and i plan to continue. i've been building muscle which might be fudging the numbers on the scale. but still. i hope my body kicks in and says "ok this is whats going on, i get it now" and the weight starts to come off. i know it will happen eventually. this working out thing does not show fast results. the results come later but in the meantime i have to keep it up.

anyway i really really really really hope i can reach my goal for xmas. i want to wear a fantastic dress and just blow everyone away. right now i think my weight loss is noticeable enough that someone might look at me and go....hmm...you look nice. or "you're looking good". and again there are some friends that i haven't seen since i was 40lbs heavier and neither of them said a word. that bugged me. so while being noticeable is fine i wanna be like WOW! i want people to have a definite reaction. i can always count on my family though. last christmas i showed up weighing 260lbs (down from 282lbs the previous year) and they were all gaga over me. i think it was my new snazzy haircut though. which reminds me, i should def get a nice haircut before christmas eve. i want to look my absolute best!! i want lots of attention.

anyway thats what i think about alot. how good its gonna feel to get that attention and look fabulous. and i'm gonna bust my ass to get there.