This weekend

I'm not even gonna bother weighing myself this weekend. I'm curious to see if I gained anything on the cruise. Honestly I don't think I did at all but I am so bloated from my period and between that and the muscle building and the slow weight loss I know I'm not gonna like the number on the scale right now. So I'm thinking I'll just skip this week and weigh again next week. I'm starting to care less about the number and more about how I look. I get so easily bumbed by not seeing the number I want. So fuck it. Of course I say that now but the temptation to weigh yourself is always strong. lol.

Anyway this Saturday is special because we're going to my husband's company bbq. Its a big deal to me because he's been working there 3 yrs and I've never met any of his co-workers. At his last job we did a couple of social things with some co-workers and it was a disaster. They were so clique-y. We felt  like rejects. It was a horrible feeling. And on top of everything I was so fat and uncomfortable with myself. Not to mention I always felt embarrassed meeting people that knew my husband. Because I felt like he deserves a better looking wife. I mean how many of us have felt that way? I have this tall lovely husband who's always been in good shape. I was always very grateful to have such a hot guy. But always self conscious that people would think "whats he doing with her?" So you can imagine I was happy to not meet anyone at this new job. But here comes this company bbq. Sounds fun. And now that I'm cute I'm really excited about going and meeting everyone. I finally feel like I'm pretty enough to be at his side. I'm his cute wife. I feel great about it. Also I'm bringing lots of yummy desserts so they're gonna love me. lol. So I'm very excited :)

I'll report back with how it went.