my family puts the dys in dysfunctional

seriously. its to the point where i can't be around them without exploding. we all have issues. all 4 of us. i certainly have my own issues with my parents but we get along just fine. but when SHE is in town all hell breaks loose. she really brings out the worst. she's horrible.

my father thinks he's speaking coherently but he doesn't realize that what he says in his head is not always what comes out of his mouth. is it senility? who knows. but oy.

my mother is the "peacemaker" which is aging her beyond belief. because i know she wants to explode constantly but she just keeps it all inside. which is probably while her blood pressure is so high.

i have faults a plenty. i don't show interest in most of what they talk about. but i think that might have to do with the fact that they don't really get to know me as an adult. but for the most part i'm a nice kid.

but she...she is the most disrespectful, rude, selfish, angry, mean person i know. from the second she walks in the door she's a total bitch. why does she even come home?? WHY? she obviously doesn't want to be here with us. she treats us like shit. i think its because she wants to visit with other friends and family while she gets free room and board, meals, and spending money. its ridiculous. she's 30 yrs old. they just cower to her every whim just to keep her from exploding. they've let her get so out of control.

i'm not gonna let her bully me. i don't need that shit. if she wants to take over my parents and christmas, so be it. thank GOD i have Ed. he is my saving grace during these times. i have no problem having our own christmas. i feel bad letting my parents down. especially my mom who tries so hard to keep the peace and keep us a "happy family" but reality check. i don't need it.

after christmas last year i remember saying "thats it, i'm not having anything to do with her ever again" and yet here i find myself trying to be nice. why bother? marlena needs to learn that if she's gonna treat people like shit, she's gonna be left alone. like YOU KNOW WHO. but they don't try to teach her anything. they just keep giving in. well it will be at the expense of me.

this is the sound of me washing my hands of it.