One year later

wow. i was just thinking about my bday next week and how last year at this time i was starting this new journey. i knew i wanted to have kids and the only thing standing in my way was my health. and i began my mission to get healthier so that i could give my baby my all. i remember...it started on my bday last year. wow...

i never would have thought that i would be here a year later. i let myself slip (since jan) and in the recent months i completely let go and gave in to all my indulgences. i did it. but now its done. and now its time to get back on track. normally i would have hated myself for not following through. but i don't! i know what i have to do. i have the tools to start over. and thats what i'll do. i'll just start back over. :) in fact i'm very very proud of myself. because last year all i had to look forward to was kids. but now i see how much i've grown and how much i've accomplished. i'm in school!! i have so many new skills. i got off my ass and followed my dreams and for that i'm really proud of myself. :) sure i thought by this summer i'd be rocking a 2 piece. but you know what? i am!! lol! i bought a new tankini and i think i look great in it. i shouldn't have to wait till i get to a certain weight to be happy and live my life. i'm living life!!

i woke up this morning and went to the gym. i remembered how good it felt last year when i was eating healthy and working out. i'm not gonna make any crazy promises. i just know i want to start getting more active and start making healthier choices. it will be really hard. because last summer i was able to devote all my energy into this. but this year i have school. its very difficult for me to have to eat somewhere other than home each day. plus i'm tired when i get home and often don't feel like preparing meals. so it will be a struggle. but i will try to make small changes here and there where i can. so let's get back on that horse :)