Wanna hear something REALLY crazy??

Roodblogger here. I'm in that state of mind these days.

And I have a CRAZY idea. one that is not realistic. we can't afford it. and its just another crazy whim of mine..but.. i just have to share it!!

i wanna learn to play the trumpet!!!! i know i know. i love horns! i had a trombone once. i somehow thought i could teach myself to play it. i was wrong. but i love the sound of the trumpet. i love how it can hit those high notes and best part is, its small! like me! :) wouldn't it be the funnest thing ever to play the trumpet in a ska band?? you could dance around on stage, not have to sing while you play, sing back up sometimes. ugh. my dream. again..never gonna happen but we're talking dream talk right now. of course its way too late. i should have done this 10yrs ago. but dreams baby! dreams!

anyway....i was futzing around and i found this place that gives lessons. and the coolest thing about it is...they say instead of making you play the boring old stuff that you usually have to learn when you learn an instrument they incorporate the kind of music the student is interested in!! umm hellooo!! if i could learn to play ska songs i would be soo interested!! i remember taking drum lessons. all i wanted to do was play songs and wail out but i spent FOREVER tappa tappa tapping. ugh it was so boring. i just totally lost interest! i mean i took drum lessons at diff places and it was always the same thing. tappa tappa tappa. fuck that. teach me something practical.

so yeah..problem is..a trumpet is like $150-$200. i could maybe sell my guitar to get it. but the real bummer is this place is located in ft lauderdale. :( i can't drive to ft laud for lessons. i wish it was in miami. if it was in miami i might think about it. but still...wasn't that a cool dream?

two faced

i have 2 sides of me. i have the Roodblog side and the Love Meli Meli side. And i'm always going back and forth. for example, a few months ago i felt like i wanted to grow up, be more family friendly and girly so i revamped my blog. and now i'm feeling more roodbloggy. i miss my edgy page. this page looks like a soccer mom's page.

i constantly go back and forth. i don't teeter. i plunge in with both feet and become engulfed in this persona. that gemini shit ain't no joke.

i feel bad for ed. wish there was a way for me to meld the two sides better instead of being all of one and none of the other. i go through phases. wish my blog could change with me. like a mood ring.

i see these young people who have careers right out of college and i think....whats wrong with me? why can't i be successful?? do i lack talent? follow through? opportunity? wish i could pinpoint it. i'm not dumb right? no no...so what is it? why can't i have a successful career??

*update*

ed is great at pep talks.

Another crazy mommy moment

Ok so I had another crazy mommy moment this weekend and bought something for my future child! now, because i'm not pregnant or even planning on being pregnant anytime soon its bad enough for me to buy little cutesy things for the baby. but this time i bought something for my future 8yr old child!! lol!! i found THE CUTEST costume at Walgreens this weekend.

you guys....i HAD to buy it!! It was a CAREBEAR costume!! OMG it was sooooooooo perfect!! and it was Sleepytime bear!! thats my favorite!!!! but its for a child. not a young young child. i mean like...8yrs old or so. lol. i couldn't resist! i didn't know when i would see it again!! but good news is it was on sale! lol. ed indulged me in my craziness and bought it for me.

you have to see it! its so cute! we put it in storage.





it even had a heart on the butt!! so cute!!

oh what a glorious morning!!

So i woke up today just before 6am as usual. I go to the bathroom and WOAH.....I GOT MY PERIOD!!! WOOHOO!! you guys this is a big deal!! the doctor said that the metformin would eventually regulate my period. and it did!!

that explains so much. why i've been so tired. the cramps. the sensitive nipples. but here's the weird thing. i didn't get my usual pms. i don't think i got moodswings. I had no clue i was getting my period. i was shocked to see the blood this morning. But here's the thing, right after i put on a tampon and headed out to the gym in a peppy mood, i started to get really achy and crampy. i couldn't bring myself to work out. i came right back and slipped into bed. the scraping feeling was intense. i felt like i had to go to the bathroom but i didn't. just pain. its weird. but i slept till about 10am and it was so luxurious and wonderful. i haven't slept like that in weeks!! man my body really needed it.

here's something to really smile about. i've been noticing my tummy getting smaller. i can feel it. so i'm guessing i lost those last 2lbs to get to a total of 20. but i don't dare get on the scale. and i'm glad i didn't! because i've been retaining water because of my period. which is even cooler. because i'm smaller even though i'm on my period! can't wait till after when i see even more result!

let me tell you, its the working out. thats the key. the metformin takes the glucose and instead of sending it to the fat cells it sends it to the energy cells. and now that i'm burning off that energy, i'm losing fat! its amazing! the lbs seem to be melting off quickly. in just 2 weeks i've seen a real change. and again, i haven't weighed myself. but i measured myself and it looks like i've lost an inch! so if i can keep up the workouts i think i'll really start seeing the results i've been wanting. even if i went down to 3 workouts a week it would still be good. since i don't know how long i can keep up this workout schedule. my goal is to do it for the entire month of oct though.

anyway...YAY!! i'm hoping to weigh myself next week or so. at this rate i will look even better than i look now for our cruise in november. :)

stomach woes

so now i only have 2 modes. constipated and diarrhea. fun right?

update

i'll try not to ramble on and on but here it goes.

for the past week and a half i've been waking up at 5:45ish am to hit the gym. due to a machine glitch i realized that i was actually doing 1 hour on the elliptical and not 30 min. so i said..ok i'll just keep doing it. so i've been doing an hour of weights and an hour of cardio. i've already noticed my tummy going down a but and my face getting smaller. i haven't dared weighed myself. after that whole debacle before i decided to weigh myself once a month. i think working out is the only way to make the metformin work for me. because the dieting alone didn't seem to be working. but maybe like they say my body just needs time to adjust and for the medicine to work. its been like a month now. i'm hoping that with the coming months it does show some kind of result. otherwise whats the point. i still have acne. i know that much. my goal for right now is just to keep up these daily workouts for the entire month. i'm not gonna make any sweeping statements, just setting this goal for the time being. i love feeling tighter and stronger.

i made some custom shirts for tricia's friends but no one has bought them yet. which is pretty annoying because i spent a lot of time working on them and thats time i didn't get paid for. i'm hoping that they do eventually buy them. also i'm contemplating creating my own tshirt line and make them myself. i've looked into it and it is doable. its the first idea i've had for my own business that was actually doable! so i'm excited about that. its on the backburner for now but definitely something on the horizon.

i may have some freelance editing work for this guy. he's totally lowballing me. $15 a video is highway robbery. but its better than nothing right now, plus it would be steady work so we'll see how it goes. if i decide i'm putting in too much work and not getting enough back i'll nix it. but i gotta say working for yourself is pretty awesome. except for the whole lack of money thing.

the best and most unexpected thing? i've sold 3 shirts from my cafe press site. fangbanger shirts. pretty cool huh? i've made $7! woohoo!